Hey there, I was wondering if I’m the only one who feels like this or not.

So I grew up thinking that we people all look different and never had a concept of something such as “white” and “black” people.

But especially in the last years I noticed more and more that a lot of people make such a big thing out of whether someone is “black” or “white” and what their ethnicity is.

It feels like it’s to the point where they make this define their core identity as if it’s very relevant how people look and how bright/dark their skin is as if this changes their personality.

It’s like so many of these people constantly bring this up to the point where it’s brainwashing and they literally even use racial slur as slang that was used in the past to devalue and enslave people based on their skin tone.

Since I experienced this it made me very uncomfortable since I never had this concept before and now I constantly have to obsessively think about it and feel like it’s manipulating me and these people still bring it up all the time.

I think this is driving me insane cause I never would think about humans so strongly because of their skin or something since it simply isn’t relevant and it just feels wrong but I can’t escape it since so many people continue to make such a big deal out of it.


Edit: To the people saying people have different advantages because of their skin, I’m fully aware of that and I wasn’t intending to debate that. My question was primarily about if other people have the same uncomfortable feeling that many people differentiate between people based on their skin and make such a big deal out of it (so more a personal feelings question than a generale debate about why it exists) because imo in a healthy society this shouldn’t be the case. But in my opinion the fact that we continue this behaviour instead of changing it is the exact reason we have racism and the issues of inequality based on someone’s skin in the first place. We need to start to change at some place and not just give up on it. If we continue to see people as “black” or “white” instead of just seeing them as “people” and only look at the past we will never end this issue. Ignorance is certainly not the solution. I found these videos where I think Elon Musk and Morgan Freeman are pretty much hitting the nail on the head.

  • yesman@lemmy.world
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    21 days ago

    The first half of your comment is an acknowledgement that you don’t understand American culture and the second half is you casting declarative judgement upon it.

    I don’t know which one of your minds to respond to.

    • Social_Discussion@lemm.eeOP
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      15 days ago

      Why would you judge it as something good to separate people based on how their skin looks like?

      • themeatbridge@lemmy.world
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        21 days ago

        I wouldn’t say it’s “good” but it is what is. Humans connect with each other through shared experiences. Growing up black in America creates a unique cross section of obligate life events. Regardless of your culture or environment, there are things that connect you to other black Americans. Some black people prefer to engage with that identity, others prefer to ignore or actively avoid it. But either way, it’s a choice that defines a significant part of their personality.

        • Social_Discussion@lemm.eeOP
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          9 days ago

          I love multiculturalism because we people naturally have different cultures. But to obsessively base everything on skin color like you people on Lemmy is just weird and racist af!

          • themeatbridge@lemmy.world
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            8 days ago

            I’m not sure who you mean by “you people” but that sounds kind of racist.

            No but seriously, I don’t think it’s racist at all to describe shared experiences, as long as you don’t presume to know someone’s life experiences by the color of their skin. For instance, a lot of black people experience police discrimination in America. Being pulled over for no reason, needing to stay calm and respectful in the face of fascism, these are normal, common experiences that can traumatize a person. Talking about those experiences with people who have lived them can help you process and heal from the trauma.

            A white person can also be pulled over by police for no reason. It could be because of the way they look. They may have been afraid that the police would randomly decide to murder them in broad daylight. This experience can happen to anyone, but because it disproportionately happens to black people, they are able to discuss it in short hand. “You been pulled over?” “Yeah, DWB. Motherfuckers.”

            Two white people would not have the same conversation. “I got pulled over.” “Speeding?” “No, no reason at all.” “That happened to me once. Broken tailight, the cop was really nice about it.” “No, man, like he seemed angry and suspicious, and I thought he was going to arrest me or shoot me or something.” “For real?! That’s wild. You should call a lawyer and sue his ass.”

            It’s not racist to describe these two realities. It’s not racist to ask about these experiences to learn from other cultures. It is racist to assume that these experiences are universal. You couldn’t say for sure that these are the experiences of a particular individual based on their race.

            • Social_Discussion@lemm.eeOP
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              7 days ago

              No matter how many excuses you will find to justify racism it’s just not morally acceptable. As long as we won’t stop making such a big thing out of what peoples skin color or ethnicity is we will never get rid of it.

              The fact that people get discriminated and unfairly treated because they have dark or bright skin is a shame and it NEEDS to stop now instead of trying to justify why it is the case and keep on doing it.

              • themeatbridge@lemmy.world
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                7 days ago

                So we stop it by pretending it doesn’t happen? Act like nobody experiences discrimination, and they won’t? Forgive me, but that’s incomprehensible logic.

                Racism isn’t acknowledging differences, it’s demanding them. And demanding we treat everyone the same ignores the reality that different races live. We stop racism by celebrating our differences and learning from each other so that we might be more open to each other. To pretend we’re all the same is to ignore that which makes us special, and it is racism to expect the same from everyone regardless of their life experiences.

                • Social_Discussion@lemm.eeOP
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                  7 days ago

                  No that’s the exact wrong thing to do! Instead of ignoring it or trying to justify racism we need to STOP it and start tackling it by the root problem. There is no problem with different cultures and people cause that is what makes us so special in my opinion. But to devalue or discriminate someone solely based on their skin and make such a big thing about it is just wrong in my opinion. If you guys don’t see this very simple logic then I’m lost for ideas

                  • themeatbridge@lemmy.world
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                    7 days ago

                    But being black or white is part of who they are. By ignoring their race, you are in fact devaluing who they are as a person. Black and white are different. Not better, not worse, and not limited to preconceived definitions.

                    It’s like the Stephen Colbert bit where he pretended he couldn’t see color. It was humorous because he acted like it made him anti-racist, but actually it was extremely racist. Your original point is the sort of well-meaning pandering naivete he was satirizing.

      • TheDoozer@lemmy.world
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        21 days ago

        The reality is because of the lived experiences of people based on the color of their skin, people are different based on skin color. You’re right that it’s a stupid reason to think differently of people, but if people had been mistreated for many generations based on the color of their hair, and there was still a good chunk of people that something so arbitrary was somehow important, then you would want to approach a person with that hair color with understanding of that history and current struggle.

        So why does it matter? Because 100 years ago, their great-great-grandparents had any wealth they managed to build up taken from them, 70 years ago their great-grandparents were kept boxed into separate, substandard areas, and 50 years ago their grandparents were kept from being able to buy homes outside low-income, substandard housing areas, and 30 years ago their parents were told it was their fault for growing up in crime-filled, poor areas with under-funded schools. And the whole time police have continuously treated them as that same substandard, poor, likely-criminal, so they have disproportionately been put in jail or grown up with one parent in jail. This obviously doesn’t apply to everyone, but it’s enough to lead people to treat them differently, either because they presume (until otherwise established) that they are poor, poorly educated, and likely criminal (by basically racist assholes) or with a certain amount of respect for their presumed struggles.

        Taking it to an extreme, if a person comes across a very old person with a number tattooed in block letters on their forearm, they will respond one of two ways: with respect and concern for their presumed struggles and trauma, or with irrational hatred (by neo-nazis). Judging or “separating” a person for a barely noticeable tattoo that they didn’t even put on themselves may seem arbitrary, but only if you ignore the entire history that makes them different.

      • dream_weasel@sh.itjust.works
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        21 days ago

        Good? I don’t know that you have to judge it as good, but it’s easy to understand WHY and also that is serves a purpose in the US it may not serve other places.

        People naturally separate into like groups as a matter of being fundamentally tribal, even though these are barriers we generally try to break down. The point though is that in the US there is often a cultural difference when splitting between white or black, just like there’s a cultural difference for “grows payot sideburns”, “dresses flamboyantly or effeminately as a man”, “speaks Spanish at home”, etc, etc. Sure, people are just people and we don’t need to point out differences maliciously, but we ARE different and those are often things we like to celebrate. At the root, we want our differences to be a positive not a negative, but by and large we aren’t changing our cultures anymore to blend into one big homogeneous, colorless group.

        In most of Europe, black and white (or brown or purple or whatever) isn’t a meaningful cultural distinction. In the US it is. Now whether or not we should police language or even whether or not the situation is sometimes uncomfortable… those are different topics altogether.

      • TranquilTurbulence@lemmy.zip
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        21 days ago

        I really thought you weren’t American, because of the way you see the situation. I’m looking at that dumpster fire from the outside, and can’t help but think about many of the same questions you seem to have. Sounds like you might have grown up in a multicultural environment, where modern hate media and polarization sounds completely alien to you.