Ill start:
“Me cago en tus muertos” - ill shit all over your dead relatives. Spanish.
The disapproving and insulted look of a Canadian when you’ve done something so stupid that they can’t even apologize for it.
It’s when there’s no apology or jokes, just the look, that you know you’ve become the stupidest fucker north of these here prairies and bears ya know.
Greetings from Poland.
“bambaryła” - someone who is very silly. Also: someone who is very fat. A little old-fashioned.
That’s not exact:
- Me cago en tus muertos = I shit on your ancestors / I shit on your dead relatives.
- Me cago en todos tus muertos = I shit on all of your ancestors / I shit on all of your dead relatives.
And in the theme of insults from Spain, a loaded one is also: Me cago en tu puta madre = I shit on your fucking mother / I shit on your whore mother
See, the thing with “puta/puto” is that it literally means “whore”, but it’s used to empathize cursings just like “fucking” is used in english. We’re even misusing it by putting it before verbs, imitating it’s use in english.
Yiddish is not my native language but I think this one is so good it absolutely deserves a mention:
All of your teeth shall fall out except one that gives you a massive toothache.
German Korinthenkacker (currant shitter) is someone who tries to win an argument by looking at unimportant details.
“Te falta una patata para el kilo” (in Spanish)
English: “You’re missing one potato for the kilo.”
When you want to call someone a fool or an idiot, you question if they’re in their right mind, if they use their head before speaking or doing something.
Spanish from Spain, right?
In Argentina we say
- “Le faltan jugadores” (He/she is short of a few [football/soccer] players)
- “Le faltan caramelos en el frasco” (He/she is missing candies in the jar)
“Le faltan jugadores” (He/she is short of a few [football/soccer] players)
no fucking way lol
Pannekoek.
You figure it out.
Pancake?
Damn. I was hoping for Cock-Pain.
piemelpijn?
There’s also koekwaus
Typically those people talk lulkoek.
Tiny cock?
pancake, because flat and without real content. Plus, it just sounds good.
“mange tes morts” in french, can be translated to “eat your deads” which is like go fuck yourself
Very Belgian: He doesn’t have all his fries in the same bag / Il n’a pas toutes ses frites dans le même sachet
Meaning that he’s/she’s dumb or confused :D
The English equivalent being, “She is several chicken nuggets short of a happy meal”
The German equivalent is “Not all cups in the cupboard”
The Australian equivalent is “a few snags (sausages) short of a barbie (barbeque)”
A few sandwiches short of a picnic.
A few cards short of a deck.
Similar to “He’s one can short of a six pack”
Brazilian portuguese tends to lack impactful phrases, but is full of single curse words. A big portion of them a clear example of how much negative bias there is culturally against certain groups (gay men, women in general, disabled), unfortunately :/
One that isn’t often used, but that I almost always laugh loud whenever I hear, is “Enfia uma dentadura no cu e sorria pro caralho”, which roughly translates into “Stick a denture up your asshole and smile at the dick”. For when simply saying “go fuck yourself” isn’t enough.
“Enculeur de poules mortes” which basically means dead chicken fucker. It’s translatable but sounds so much better in french.
I have never heard this in my life. Where are you from?
Probably Quebec or Montreal.
Eww, gross.
spoiler
Just kidding y’all :)
Something about how fancy French sounds, juxtaposed with how vulgar the insult is, that makes it stick.
Like a guy in a tuxedo, but with his junk out
In English it’s more like a guy at Walmart in sweatpants with his junk out; not that shocking
I knew about “enculeurs de mouches”, or fly fucker, that is said about a person that is way too picky about useless details
In Dutch that would be called an ant fucker (mierenneuker)
A few years ago, when #MeToo was a big thing, I took a photo of an ant, and slapped the text #MierToo, specifically to mock and send to mierrenneukers
Here are a few Austrian ones:
“Häferl” (Cup): someone with anger management issues
“Du rüttelst am Watschenbaum” (You are shaking the slap tree): I’m close to deliver the fruit of said tree to you.
“Ohrwaschlkaktus” (Ear cactus): Someone with large, protruding ears
“Saubauch” (Hog belly): A way of telling someone that they are fat and dumb at the same time. But in a nice way.
Calling a male a “nephew” in Chinese 契弟 kai dai is calling them a male prostitute.
Usually it doesn’t mean target male has actually been used sexually, but commonly used for general belittlement.
This term comes from ancient times: Traveling businessmen who would take a young boy with them for sexual use, but if anyone on the road or destination asked who the boy was, the business man would euphemistically explain “He’s my nephew”
契弟 kai dai is commonly translated as “nephew” but it means “adopted brother”
“Κλάσε μου τα αρχίδια” which literally stands for “fart my balls” in Greek.
It’s a way of telling someone to go fuck himself.
Which can also be lovely further embellished such as “πάρε φορά και κλάσε μου τ’αρχιδια” (“take momentum and fart my testicles”) or “θα μου κλάσεις μια μάντρα αρχίδια” (“You’ll fart me a yard of testicles”, usually utilized as a defiant answer to a physical threat)
“Spargeltarzan”, which is German for “asparagus Tarzan”. Basically someone who is physically weak, but tall and lanky.
I also like “Lauch”, which just translates to “leek”, the veggie. Oh, and “Bohnenstange”, which means bean stalk. We do seem to have quite a few vegetable-related insults in German, now that I think of it…